


Sweet

by streimel



Series: Behind Closed Doors [1]
Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Friendship, M/M, One-sided donggyu, One-sided wooyeol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-21
Updated: 2014-04-21
Packaged: 2018-01-20 05:57:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1499196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/streimel/pseuds/streimel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dongwoo becomes a totally different person behind closed doors, but Woohyun is the only person that will ever see it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweet

**Author's Note:**

> yo this is the first story I've written in like 7 years so if it's poo I deeply apologize

"You know the feeling/

When you're in too deep?/

And then you make it out/

The taste so sweet/

Sweet"

 

Dongwoo almost, almost feels bad about the situation. Almost. And really, if he stopped to think about it, he would feel bad. So he doesn't dwell on it.

Whatever this is (he has yet to find a word or phrase or idiom to describe it, and he wonders if maybe English has one - he keeps meaning to look it up but forgets in the hustle and bustle of idol life), it's weird. It's not friends with benefits, or even an affair of convenience. He really thinks, in those moments before he beats down the thoughts of it when they creep into his brain, that's it part desperation for contact, part genuine affection for one another, and maybe, part curiosity.

The curiosity part is debatable, at least on his part. He's never been curious really, because ever since he woke up one morning with a hard dick and a burning need for release when he was a teenager, and maybe even before that, everyone's been able to make his heart beat and to send shivers down his spine and to make his mouth go dry. Well, not everyone, but guys and girls indiscriminately. His first kiss? A boy. First time having sex? A girl. He's had numerous experiences with both and never really separated the two in his mind. Sure, he could write a novel on the differences between genders, but he could also probably dedicate a few chapters to the differences in the first girl who gave him head and the girl he had sex with first - the differences in their physique, their skin, their voices and hair texture and personalities and etc. Everyone is uniquely beautiful to him in their own way, end of story.

Woohyun, on the other hand...Dongwoo isn't so sure. Woohyun talks a big talk about his school days, about girls he's kissed (and more), but he has his doubts. The first time Woohyun crawled into his hotel bed, silent and shaking but more enthusiastic than anyone he's probably been with by half, he sloppily and awkwardly kissed and licked and sucked with a tender naïveté that Dongwoo still wakes up sweating sometimes nearly a year later. For a moment, Dongwoo felt like he was back with the first person (a guy) he ever did more than make-out with when he was 15, the messy kisses with too much teeth and that strange awkward learning curve when you touch someone else's dick besides your own and you learn some people don't like it as soft or fast or tight as you do and it throws you for a loop. It ended up with a thrashing Woohyun pressed back into the bed while Dongwoo sucked him off, and Dongwoo would have bet a lot of money that he was the first person to ever get him off. He even barely protested when Dongwoo kissed his jaw right below his ear saying he could return the favor next time, which would have usually miffed him, but for the first time in a better part of three years, Dongwoo had some sexual release. He wasn't going to complain about that.

And so Dongwoo dragged Woohyun down a road of discovery and self-discovery, protecting Woohyun's fragile-as-an-egg ego and playboy facade by making it seem like it was Woohyun learning all of Dongwoo's quirks and sensitive spots and favorite moves by himself, and that it wasn't his hand tightening Woohyun's on his dick, or pushing his head to kiss that sensitive spot right above his left collar bone - no, of course not, that was all Woohyun's doing. Dongwoo can't complain. Woohyun has learned to take care of him well.

They only do this when they shack up in hotel rooms, but not because they care about anyone finding out. It's like a special treat, a getaway present. He rarely thinks (because he really tries hard not to) of Woohyun sexually when they are in the dorms, but sometimes when they get on a plane he gets hard in a Pavlovian response, knowing what's coming, and he'll spot Woohyun across the aisle and they'll make eye contact, and Woohyun'll give him this greasy little smirk and he just knows that Woohyun's read some kinky shit online and tonight he'll end up blindfolded and being teased with feathers or something fucked up like that.

And he knows he'll love every minute of it.

* * *

 

Woohyun is obviously attracted to him, but it took Dongwoo a better part of a year (and a lot of hotel room stays) to figure out he does it because he thinks this is the best way to give back to Dongwoo...something. And this is where he feels bad.

It's almost like a bizarro world in those hotel rooms. Everyone on the outside, even the rest of the guys, look at Dongwoo as the umma of the group, the caring, touchy-feely, loving one who takes it upon him self to try to swallow up everyone else's pain. And truthfully, he does. It's tiring, but it's who he is.

Until the door closes at least.

Once the door closes in the hotel room, that Dongwoo waits outside in the corridor, probably staring at the other's room and wondering if they are okay, while this Dongwoo sits back and lets Woohyun work his magic. Woohyun is a release, and while he wouldn't say he's "using" him, it's damn near close. He doesn't kiss him on the forehead while he's fucking him (and that's what it is, fucking), he doesn't tell him he's beautiful, he doesn't pull him to his side when they are done and bury his head into his hair and stroke his back. Woohyun isn't his boyfriend or even his friend in here. He's his release, and that's that.

On Woohyun's part, he doesn't seem to mind. This is where the dread swirls in his belly, snakelike and cold. Woohyun is so innocent in this respect he doesn't even know he deserves much better. He doesn't deserve to be someone's fuck doll for relieving stress. He deserves everything good. Someone who doesn't pretend they don't notice when his orgasm hits a resonating spot that brings tears to his eyes. Someone who will sit behind him in a bath and massage his shoulders and kiss his back in a loving, not sexual way. Someone who gives him as much as he deserves and listens to his problems and doesn't fucking use him.

(Like, one time, in a dark practice room, he saw Sungyeol (even him, Mr. Selfish of all people) attentively rubbing Woohyun's back while he sobbed about something stupid (and it was, even caring non-hotel room Dongwoo thought it was silly) and for a moment his other persona lashed out, yelling " **THIS** is what he needs you to be, always...")

But, really, Dongwoo needs Woohyun. And Woohyun proceeds with a cheery enthusiasm (the curiosity, maybe?) that he couldn't fabricate even if he wanted to. So it continues.

* * *

 

It continues that every morning in a hotel, much like this one, he'll wake up with a warm Woohyun wrapped around him, fit to his body snuggly and secure. He never returns the favor, has never thought to, and Woohyun has never asked. When they fall asleep, Woohyun cuddles him and runs his hands lovingly down his side, up his arm, over his chest. In another world, Dongwoo would grab those hands and kiss them and squeeze those arms around him tight and whisper "goodnight, baby". But that world exists outside of these rooms.

Like every other morning, he can feel Woohyun slowly rise up out of sleep, legs moving and stretching and breathing deep sighs. He can feel Woohyun nuzzling the back of his neck with his nose, like always, warm breath fanning down his shoulders and the smile pressed to his neck of a sleepy-headed Woohyun. In a minute, like always, he'll whisper "good mooooorrrrnnnning" in a dry, cracked voice that desperately needs a glass of water and just 5 more minutes of sleep, please.

But Dongwoo's been up for an hour, really pouring over the bedmate attached to his back like a parasite. Something always has to give, and exactly 1 year, 2 months, and 14 days (not that he remembers the date like it's his own birthday or anything) after Woohyun first straddles him in the dark without saying a word, all Dongwoo's curiosity comes tumbling out.

"You're not in love with me, right? Because you'd be stupid if you were."

Woohyun freezes in his nuzzling for a moment, and Dongwoo is almost worried he's crossed some invisible line he didn't think he existed between them, but then Woohyun is flopping on his back, fist stuffed in his mouth trying to silence the loud guffaws spilling out of his body like the tears falling from his eyes.

"You? YOU?! Oh god, that's rich!"

Woohyun's in the fetal position, hands clutched to his aching ribs while he continues to laugh on and on.

Maybe Dongwoo should be offended, but relief is pouring through him a drug spreading throughout his body. He's an ass like this, plain and simple, and while he's fallen for plenty of assholes who used him and knows it's very possible, he doesn't want to do that to Woohyun.

"No, Dongwoo. I'm not in love with _you_. My god, the very thought!" and he's giggling again.

The emphasis on the word you catches Dongwoo's attention. Woohyun and him rarely talk in here, especially about things not related to "trust me, this thing is safe, I promise I researched this!" in it's various permutations and a mixed cacophony of exclamations and exhalations and encouragements in bed. But one time, one single time, about three times in, Woohyun locked the door behind them and immediately said "you're in love with Sunggyu, aren't you?" and Dongwoo said "yup" in a manner so nonchalantly he might as well have been asked if he's read today's paper and they never discussed it after that because honestly it's the biggest open secret in the band and he thinks even management knows but no one ever says a word about it so Dongwoo can almost pretend he doesn't stare a little too hard too often or lay down on Sunggyu's bed when he's gone and smell his pillows and blankets and sheets or that the real reason he shuts down with Woohyun is because he projects the exact behavior he gets from Sunggyu when the cameras turn off, not cold but not welcoming. Nope.

But right now, even hotel room Dongwoo cares enough to not let that word, that emphasis slip by. Because maybe he's waking up. Or maybe he's tired of being an ass. Or maybe outside Dongwoo slipped inside and locked hotel room Dongwoo out this time.

"It's Sungyeol, isn't it? That's who you love."

He's pretty sure he wasn't aware until this very moment that that's who it is. Or maybe he was, but he shut it out. He's wrapped up in his own unhappiness and need and he tries to shut out everyone else's because then it really is too much for him. But now he's remembering a thousand tiny moments on film in his mind of Woohyun sliding his arm around Sungyeol's waist or extra complementing him in interviews or flirting with him on Twitter. Each moment is so short and subtle but when each slide of film is put together it could create a movie of longing glances and lingering touches and whispered conversations in the back of the van.

It's a sinking feeling he feels, low and deep in his belly. He's shut out so much in his own desire to pretend that no one in the band secretly (or not so secretly) loves each other and longs and wants and agonizes over someone else like he does. He can take the stresses of idol life and the separation from family and what not, swallow those whole from someone to ease their minds, but he's turned a blind eye to this, to Woohyun's pain, inside of the room and outside of it, because it's too much like his own struggle. And acknowledging Woohyun's longing would be like acknowledging his own. So he's continued this, so he can pretend neither of them need or desire or love anyone else. 

Woohyun isn't laughing anymore.

"Hey, we don't...we don't do this here. I didn't agree to this conversation." Woohyun answers stiffly, but he doesn't seem angry or distant or upset. Maybe a bit confused, and definitely a bit tired.

"You asked me about Sunggyu" Dongwoo shoots back, turning over on his side to look at Woohyun, who's studying the ceiling intently like his life depends on it.

Woohyun rolls his eyes like Dongwoo just said the dumbest thing ever.

"Really, that was just confirming everything. I just wanted to be sure, you know? Everyone guessed. Guesses. I just didn't want to get the situation wrong and -"

"Okay, great. Answer the question, kid." Dongwoo puts just enough force in his tone to make Woohyun sheepishly glance over before returning his gaze to the ceiling, pondering.

He wishes he could put a finger of Woohyun's mood right now. He's definitely not angry, not sad, and not really defensive. He seems slightly upset, but mostly unsure, and Dongwoo doesn't know whether to keep pushing or take a step back and wait. Hotel room Dongwoo wants to be pushy while outside Dongwoo keeps preventing his mouth from opening up. A real devil and angel on each shoulder situation. How tedious.

His dark side keeps reminding him that his lil' ole angelic self gets him the rest of the time and that they are now on his hours until he leaves the hotel room, but when he opens his mouth to pick at Woohyun again, suddenly Woohyun's there, pressed on top of him, tongue pushing past his lips to sweep into his mouth.

Normal Dongwoo is mentally screaming inside that this, for the first time, is actually really wrong. Unlike his usual playful self, Woohyun is pouring out whatever he's been locking inside into Dongwoo, and this Dongwoo screams back that, no, this is good, because all of those times Woohyun tore him open and ripped out the hurt and pain and need and sewed him back up, scarred but healing, this is the first time he's ever been Woohyun's release like that, and it's about time he started giving back.

So, just like that first night, he pushes Woohyun back into the bed, but this time, he isn't selfish like he usually is. He takes time to strip off Woohyun clothes slowly, to tease and tempt him. He scratches his nails down Woohyun's sides just the way he likes, the way that makes goosebumps creep across his skin. He bites down gently on his collar bone, and slides down until Woohyun's nipple is in his mouth. He keeps sucking harshly even when Woohyun begins to cry out and buck up against him, long fingers pulling his hair roughly, a big no-no in the past for them.

He teases Woohyun's cock through his underwear, drawing a nail against his growing erection through the cloth, slowly going up and down again and again. He takes Woohyun's long index finger into his mouth, imitating what he's going to do next, which causes Woohyun to gasp, because he rarely ever goes down on Woohyun.

"You're not going to...you don't have to-"

But Dongwoo's already cutting him off with a deep kiss while his hand slips into Woohyun's underwear to grasp him gently, and any protests Woohyun might have had fall away.

He strokes him for a while manually, drawing him close and letting him plateau, but never enough to be frustrating. He hasn't gone down on Woohyun in a few months, and never more than a handful of times, but he's always surprised by the sharp whine and frantic hands grabbing for something to hold on to every time Dongwoo first takes him in his mouth. Dongwoo always thought he was just okay at blow jobs, but Woohyun's reaction never ceases to make him feel like a porn star, and he admits to himself it feels good. Feels good to make someone, even someone you're not necessarily in love with like that, feel cared for and cherished and sexy all at the same time.

And so he says it. Even though he never, ever, ever says anything of any real meaning during these times. But this time is different, and even Woohyun knows that.

"God, you _are_ really fucking sexy."

Woohyun's eyes pop open and his head lifts up from the pillow, mouth ajar.

"What did-" he begins, but Dongwoo's already flipping him on top and sliding a finger into him, because that's Woohyun's favorite position and he really doesn't want to hear him wax philosophical on his sudden change in behavior when they've got more important shit to get to.

Dongwoo preps him slowly, easing in another finger and another until Woohyun is riding his hand. He usually prefers to be on top, face pressed into Woohyun's shoulder and eyes just as closed as his mind to the world, but Woohyun comes easiest on top, and isn't even a question in Dongwoo's mind that he should let Woohyun ride him.

They settle in a much slower pace than normal, with Dongwoo stroking Woohyun with one hand while using the other to help him meet each of his thrusts in a rhythmic fashion. It only takes a few moments for them to find that special spot, and when Woohyun cries out, he sets a pace he knows Woohyun likes. This is the first time Dongwoo can actively remember looking at Woohyun's face while he fucked him, and he admittedly finds he's been missing out. He feels the harsh bite of Woohyun's fingers into his biceps, holding on for dear life with his head thrown back and mouth agape. His eyes pan down Woohyun's body, taking in the flat plane of stomach and the dark curls at the junction of his legs. He can see himself disappear and reappear into Woohyun's body, sinking and receding, dominating and pulling back, and even though he's seen it before, in other men, this view is novel and thrilling with Woohyun and so, so fucking hot, to the point where his hips buck, causing Woohyun to sob a little, and he nearly loses it, right there. And even still, he knows he's not going to be able to hold on much longer, because Woohyun in clenching around him again and again, desperately close, and it feels like heaven.

So he redoubles his effort, surging up into Woohyun with renewed energy all while matching his thrusts with his hand, strong but gentle around Woohyun's cock. Woohyun tries to say something, probably to warn Dongwoo of what's coming (because cumming on Dongwoo is another no-no) but Dongwoo is soothing him before he can get any words out, urging him to "come for me, Woohyun". And then Woohyun is over the edge, eyes as wide as his mouth, staring into Dongwoo's eyes as he comes, wave after wave, onto Dongwoo's stomach and chest, and the intensity of his stare sends Dongwoo chasing right after him, desperate to keep up, pouring himself into Woohyun.

And then Dongwoo is breaking away, not from Woohyun but from himself, and he pulls him down into his arms, against his chest, not caring about the mess, and buries his nose in Woohyun's hair, a hand lovingly stroking his heaving back. Because he does really care, even like this.

* * *

 

Dongwoo had every intention of sitting Woohyun down immediately, but he wakes up alone much later, totally unaware he had fallen asleep, and realizes there's an angry Sunggyu pounding at the door, sternly reminding him he has 20 minutes to shower, pack, and dress before they leave him here in the country and he can find his own way back to Korea. And so he shoots up, momentarily noticing all of Woohyun's stuff is packed and waiting for the bellhop to come with the trolley, though the man himself is nowhere to be seen. But priorities are priorities, and Woohyun couldn't have gotten too far.

He finds him sitting alone downstairs in a cafe, drinking an orange juice while mindlessly messing with his phone.

"Thanks for waking me up, kid."

Woohyun looks up, startled, but smiles immediately.

"I tried! I even...cleaned, uhm, you up if you didn't notice. You didn't even move," he replies haltingly, looking around subtly as if the nearby European tourists could understand Korean.

Huh, he hadn't noticed that. Woohyun really can be extra thoughtful, more so than he deserves.

"Look...I don't think this is the right time or place, but you know you're not getting away from this conversation, right?"

"Hm? Oh, sure. I just didn't want to have it in there, I guess. Because..."

And for the first time since this whole thing started, he sees the reservation Woohyun holds about him. He feels sick. He's an asshole. He's a jerk. He doesn't deserve Woohyun, even as a friend.

"Because I'm different in there," he finishes for Woohyun, disgusted with himself.

"Yeah, a bit. But it's not really a problem, you know? I'm not so much of an idiot; I wouldn't willingly submit myself to harsh or unfair treatment. I just wouldn't, uh, want to have an in-depth discussion with that Dongwoo, is all."

 _Not so much of an idiot, my ass_ , he thinks. He can tell Woohyun isn't lying - he really didn't see the harm in the way Dongwoo treated him for the last year and more. But that's another conversation for another day.

He can see Sunggyu approaching from the lobby, and he knows they have to leave. Woohyun's also noticed him, and grabs his bag and juice, but sits down again, staring strangely at Dongwoo.

"Hey...look, I don't know why...it changed like that. I mean, I, uh, I guess I'm just confused about what just happened. I mean it was great but, like, that's not us, you know, and..."

"Sometimes, when you're breaking up with someone, on mutual terms, you have awesome break-up sex. A last hurrah of sorts."

"Are we...breaking up?"

"Yeah, I guess. Yeah we are."

"Like...I mean we can't break up really, right? Because it was never a thing. So it's just done. Completed. Fin."

"Right." Dongwoo shoots a side-long glance at Woohyun to gauge his reaction, but he seems to have no great response either way, except to be bemused. So they walk out arm in arm, passing a disgruntled Sunggyu complaining about a late Hoya, totally carefree as only normal Dongwoo and normal Woohyun can be together.

Right before they get in the van, Woohyun pulls him back for a second, whispering in his ear.

"You know, I'm really fine with this, but I'm curious why, you know? That was majorly unexpected." But Dongwoo doesn't provide an answer.

At least, he doesn't provide one out loud to Woohyun. But inside, he answers his own thought process of why he's doing this.

It's because he has a plan.

**Author's Note:**

> part 2 coming soon please anticipate!!


End file.
